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What’s yours? Nicknames, I’ve had a few. I could probably write a song with that title, no?

There are nicknames we like, love and loathe. Some are lazy nicknames.. Aussies have a particular knack of adding an ‘o’ or ‘ie’ to the end of a name to make it into a nickname:

  • Robbo, Robbie, Rob-star
  • Vonnie, Von, Vonster
  • Stevie, Stevo, Stevie-boy, Last-to-leave-Steve
  • Pippy, Pips
  • Janey, J

More recently we’ve taken a bit of urban culture and started calling boys D-man (Daniel) or A-train (Adam). I have a soft spot for the particular nicknaming which came from J.Lo and P.Diddy. It doesn’t work for some names like Y.Ad but it certainly does for people like my friend T. Yo (Trevor Young).

The best nicknames are the non-lazy ones. The ones which inherently describe something about the person. My first one was Spinna. I lived in the north west of WA and I was well known to talk alot (is alot one word or two, I never know, do you? I am a poet and I did know it but I’d rather refer to myself as a wannabe hip hop rap artist beat poet of sorts). I spoke loudly. And fast. They said I was a ‘spin out’ which eventually spun into Spinna. I had a boyfriend with the last name Monks and we were affectionately known (and had the t-shirts to prove it) as Spinna & Monksy.

One particular nickname was stuck to me for one short high school year : I had been bullied for 2 years by a bunch of girls who thought it was completely hilarious that my mother made me wear the regulation school uniform right down to the desert boots (DB’s), ankle socks and school dress NOT SHORTENED (can you imagine… that’s practially abuse when you think how horrific it is for a girl not to be able to make her uniform look like the others.. more on mothers in another post). I would hide in the library at recess and lunch to avoid the taunts and RUN HOME WITHOUT LOOKING BACK every single day after school.

(I had one of those ‘soldier on!’ type of mums who would say ‘until you come home with bruises or scrapes I can’t do anything!.. Oops – digressing.. I said more about mothers later. Right.)

One day, pressure-cooker-style, I snapped. Some other ME kicked in and told the bully to meet me in the locker room at lunch time. I decided I was going to end it for one of us. At that moment I didn’t care which one of us it was going to be.. I was simply convinced this event would end the torture. Just like you see on TV, 15 girls stood around while Spinna and the bully went at it for TWO HOURS (read: 4.25 minutes). Pulling hair, scratching, kicking, slapping, whacking. Makes me feel sick just thinking of it.

BUT.I.WON! She gave up! She said stop before me! Victory was mine! I actually had no idea what to do with this victory. Many girls came to me, walked away with me, stayed with me from that day until we left school. Within a few minutes, people were calling me…. wait for it…


That nickname stuck for the rest of Year 8.

The nickname I’ve ended up with is Mega. Most people who meet me now think this is because I’m pretty loud and colourful but there is a story behind it:

I created a character in 1996 called Ms Megabyte. She (I) would appear on national TV, radio, press, magazines and the internet ‘demystifying’ technology. Bert Newton started the nickname Mega and everywhere I appeared I would be eventually called Mega. 8 out of 10 people who met me around that time had absolutely no idea my name was Yvonne. Some of them came to be such good friends they attended my wedding and I really don’t think they ever knew my real name until the celebrant used it.

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I found, in new groups, when I’d introduce myself as Yvonne then all my mates would refer to me as Mega, the new person would get so confused. I just started introducing myself as Mega. Until one day, someone told me it seemed quite vain to call myself by my own nickname. He said it was egotistical because it was like an invitation for people to say ‘mega – where did that name come from’ to which I would have to respond ‘my TV character Ms Megabyte’.

Which is the reason for this post. Is it ok to call YOURSELF by your own nickname? What is your nickname?

5 nicknames I’ve had:

  • Vonnie
  • Spinna
  • Mega
  • Ms Shuffle (T. Yo’s attempt at poking fun at ‘megabyte’ which was the size of the iPod shuffle)
  • Rocky Lady

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